Understanding Emotional Neglect’s Impact & Learning How to Heal

Your past helps mold and shape you into the person you are today — the good, the bad, and the ugly.

The experiences you went through when you were younger, whether you don’t remember them or don’t want to remember them, tend to stay with you.

Some of these memories or events will even affect you in your adulthood. Going through an experience like emotional neglect is one of those things that tend to stay with a person, no matter how hard they try to push away their associated memories of those experiences.

Let’s take the time to learn more about emotional neglect, its impact, and how you can heal.

What is Emotional Neglect?

Emotional neglect is a type of neglect from a primary caregiver when they aren’t able to provide the attention, support, or validation that a child requires during their developmental years. Essentially, it’s when a primary caregiver cannot meet a child’s basic emotional needs. While other forms of neglect are based on things that are occurring within a home or to a child, emotional neglect is based on what isn’t happening.

The Impact of Emotional Neglect

There are many different signs and symptoms associated with emotional neglect that can occur in both children and adults. These are just a few of the ways that emotional neglect can impact a person and their life.

Low Self-Esteem

Someone who went through emotional neglect may find themselves struggling with their self-esteem while they’re growing up and into their adulthood. Since they didn’t have the support they needed while growing up, it can leave them feeling unimportant, belittled, and unworthy.

Difficulty Managing Emotions

A common sign among both children and adults who went through emotional neglect is emotional regulation difficulties. Individuals will struggle with identifying and expressing their own emotions and how they’re really feeling about certain situations. Instead, they may become numb to their feelings or have frequent outbursts.

Insecure Attachment Style

Insecure attachment styles are common among individuals who have endured emotional neglect. They’re likely to form an avoidant or anxious attachment style, which can negatively impact their relationships later in life.

Relationship Struggles

Relationships can be challenging to form and maintain after experiencing neglect. Since a person who experiences neglect never really sees what a healthy relationship looks like, they’ll have a difficult time forming a healthy relationship themselves. Additionally, they’ll often have issues trusting, being vulnerable, or being intimate with others.

How to Heal

While your past can shape you into who you are today, it doesn’t define you. Just because you went through something in your childhood doesn’t mean you have to deal with it for the rest of your life. You may not have been able to pick your caregivers, but you can choose how you live your life moving forward. This is how you can learn to heal from emotional neglect.

Acknowledge Your Experience

The longer you go on trying to dismiss how you feel, the longer you’ll experience the signs and symptoms of the aftermath of your neglect. You can’t keep running from your past. Allowing yourself to feel can help kickstart the healing process.

Give Yourself Grace

It’s important to give yourself grace during this time. You may experience times of growth and times of backtracking. This is normal. Healing isn’t linear. Be kind to yourself.

Seek Professional Help

You may find that it’s easier to withdraw from your loved ones and isolate. This is a short-term solution to a much larger problem. Plus, doing so can actually lead to worsening signs and symptoms. Instead, consider reaching out to an outside third party for additional support. A licensed and trained mental health professional will be able to work with you to help you talk about your struggles and how to overcome them. Reach out today to learn more about how we can help you heal.